U.S. And France Want Sanctions Against Iran

President Obama has joined French President Sarkozy in pushing for international sanctions against Iran. It's an effort to stem what Sarkozy calls Iran's "mad race" for nuclear weapons.



Bombs Away

Mr. Obama and the leader of France
Have joined forces in opposing Iran.
They hope more countries will join in their stance
In promoting a nuclear ban.

They're calling on leaders of all of the nations
To help keep things under control
By voting for sanctions to relieve all frustrations
And to work to keep Planet Earth whole.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Man Admits Plot Against The President

Daniel Cowart of Tennessee has pleaded guilty to plans to kill candidate Barack Obama in 2008. Authorities say the plot involved plans to kill other blacks as well. Cowart and a co-defendant who pleaded guilty earlier, will be sentenced next month.


Fessin' Up

A white supremacist from Tennessee
Has talked to the Feds and copped a plea.
It seems that back in Two Thousand Eight,
He and a friend were consumed with hate.

Described as skinheads with plans to kill,
Something they didn't get to fulfill,
The two, it appears, were quite hell-bent
To do in the man who's now President.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Obama Calls On Afghans To Take A Bigger Role

President Obama called on the Afghan government to take a bigger part in defending itself against the Taliban and al-Qaida. He told his counterpart, Hamid Karzai that he and his Cabinet need to be more directly involved in the fighting.



Response-Ability

The president spent time
In Afghanistan
To say we’ll be leaving
As soon as we can.

He’d like to see Afghans
Give more of a hand
In driving the bad guys
From out of their land.

Most of the people who
Elected Barack
Want us to knock off the fighting
And bring our troops back.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Robbery Suspect Foiled After Asking Directions

Police in Orem, Utah, say a man stole some phones from a convenience store and then stopped a police officer to ask for directions. The officer noted the man's description matched that given of the thief by an employee of the store that was robbed.



Hold The Phone

Utah police say
The man is a thief;
They add his arrest
Has saved them much grief.

They say he stole phones,
And ran from the site,
Then flagged down a cop
To help in his flight.


© 2010 Jim Gordon

Mother Of Octuplets Agrees To Promote PETA

Nadya Suleman has agreed to let PETA folks put a sign in her front yard urging dog and cat owners to have their pets spayed and neutered. A spokesperson for the "Octomom" says PETA has offered to pay $5,000 for the privilege. Meantime, Suleman is said to be trying to refinance a balloon mortgage.




Litter Control

The PETA folks go about preaching
To folks they're committed to teaching;
But they money they're paying
Linking Octomom to spaying
May be seen by some folks as "reaching."
© 2010 Jim Gordon

Pentagon To Act On Gay Ban

Defense Secretary Robert Gates is expected to address the question of gays in the military this week. A pentagon spokesman says Gates may have a plan for making life a bit easier for homosexuals.




Easing Tensions

The Secretary of Defense
Wants service life to be less tense
With a plan to make things more humane
For people living with the strain.

The Pentagon has passed the word
That Robert Gates won't be deterred
From seriously addressing ways
To ease the tensions faced by gays.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Health Reform Raises Wrath

Arizona Republican John McCain says the health care bill passed by Democrats means government takeover of health care. McCain predicts reaction will be felt in the courts and at the polls.


GOPeeved

John McCain has joined in the fray
Over a health care bill that's raised his dismay.

The Senator from the Republican side
Sees this as a bill he just can't abide.

The measure, he says, has little support,
And just won't survive when taken to court.

It's clear, says McCain, that it's in for rejection,
As are it's backers when they face re-election.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Tiger Woods Answers Questions

ESPN and The Golf Channel interviewed Tiger Woods on Sunday. They were each given 5 minutes to ask their questions. Woods says he, alone, is to blame for his problems and he’s continue to receive treatment.


Tiger Talks

Tiger met with some folks at ESPN
At his home for a 5-minute stay.
'Twas a session designed to put one to sleep,
Since he really had nothing to say.

It seems things, of late, have been a real mess;
And his marriage has suffered a glitch.
All the press he’s received since Thanksgiving Day
Has made his whole life a real bitch.

Therapy, 'twould seem, has a long way to go,
Though he’s returning to golf and his friends.
He’ll keep on reporting for treatment, he says,
And working on making amends.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Man Accused of Disabling 100 Vehicles

Police accuse a Texas man of using computer skills to stall the ignitions and set of the horns of vehicles sold by his former employer. They say Omar Ramos-Lopez had earlier been fired by the dealership.


Horning In

Police say things were a mess
When Omar hacked GPS,
Disabling ignitions,
Roughing up dispositions;
And causing no end of distress.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Couple Jailed For Text Messages

The following piece of verse is an alternate version
of the story of two folks in Dubai who've been jailed
"out of context."




Sexy Texting

What a judge terms indecent email
Will be punished, he says, without fail.
It's risque and awry;
Not allowed in Dubai;
So he's sending the writers to jail.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Couple Jailed For Text Messages

A judge in Dubai has sentenced a couple from India to 90 days in jail for what he describes as sexual in content. Such messages, it seems, are against the law in the United Arab Emerates.


Caught Being Naughty

Text messages read in Dubai
Would seem to have gone awry.
Accused of being risque,
A couple is going away.
Ninety days, says the judge, is their due,
For their messages deemed as blue.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Woods To Play In Masters

Tiger Woods is returning to the golf course in time for the Masters.
He'll tee off April 8 after a four-month layoff. ESPN and CBS will
televise the tournament.


Out Of The Woods

CBS Sports And ESPN
Are happy that Tiger is playing again.
He's coming back soon to join in the Masters,
Setting off cheers among telecasters.

The networks expect record numbers of viewers
To tune in while sipping their Bud Lites or Dewar's,
For the comeback of golfdom's prodigal star,
And proof that his golf game is still under par.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Is Europe Provoking Muslims?

Conflicts between the culture of the West and that of Muslims
continue to provoke retaliation - including threats and attempted
murder of those accused of provocation.



Provoke-alizing

You may want free speech,
Though it might provoke the sword;
Thine "whose feelings you breach"
And "whose ox is being gored. "

© 2010 Jim Gordon

What Made The Prius Run Away

Company and federal investigators have been unable to get James Sikes' Prius to run away. Sikes had called 911 after his Toyota hybrid hit speeds of more than 90 mph. It happened, Monday, on interstate 8 near San Diego.



Drive Shaft

Jim Sikes insists his Prius
Has a mind that's all its own.
That's why he did more than ninety;
But how is still not known.

He denies accelerating,
And insists Toyota blew it.
But now investigators
Can't make the Prius do it.

The Toyota folks continue
To study and explore;
Looking for the reason
The pedal hit the floor.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Teen Sues Over Prom Cancellation

The ACLU as filed suit to force a school district in Mississippi
to sponsor its annual prom and allow a lesbian teen to invite
whomever she wants. The school cancelled the prom when the
girls asked that she be allowed to wear a tuxedo and invite her
girl friend to be her date.


Choosing Partners

The ACLU
Is going to court
On behalf of a lesbian teen.
The civil rights group
Will try to abort
A ruling it sees as quite mean.

It seems that her school
Has called off the prom
Because of her choice of a date.
The other side feels
Such events are for all,
Whether they're gay or their straight.

The crux of it all,
As it's always quite clear,
In this and similar fights,
Is the ACLU's
Commitment to sue
For what it calls the girl's student rights.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Obama Attacks Health Care Fraud

The president told voters in Missouri that it's time to end fraud
and abuse in health care. Barack Obama says he's approved the use of
high tech bounty hunters to root out the cheaters.


Finding A Cure

The president aimed his anger
At health care fraud, today.
He told Missouri voters,
It now must go away.

It costs one hundred million
Each year, a lot of juice.
He says he's signed an order,
Aimed at ending the abuse.

His plan to end the cheating,
Which he's sure will not fall short,
Includes the use of bounty hunters
With bipartisan support.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Senate Moves On Tax Breaks And Jobless Aid

Democrats are moving forward in efforts to pass a Multi-Billion Dollar tax and unemployment aid package. They're working toward a final vote on their "jobs agenda." It's designed to help reduce the jobless rate before the November elections.


Doing A Job

The Senate's cleared the way
For its jobs agenda bill
Which soon move to the House
And a vote up on The Hill.

The measure's aimed at helping
Stem the joblessness direction,
Which Democrats need to happen
Before facing re-election.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Obama Pitches His Health Plan

President Obama, speaking in Glenside, Pennsylvania, made a plea for passage of healthcare reform. He spoke to voters and students as leaders continue to work on legislation they hope can pass congress.


Pitching The Plan

As congress keeps debating
Health care for the masses,
The president keeps calling
For a health bill congress passes.

Providers of insurance,
He says, make all the rules,
Based on who’s sick and healthy
Treating us like fools.

He called on those he spoke to
For help, if they’re so prone,
In building public backing
By picking up the phone.

Calling out to voters,
He had a lot to say;
Including wider coverage
Must finally have its day.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Woman Accused Of Stealing TV Set - Again

Police in Fairbanks, Alaska, accuse a woman of trying to steal a television set. According to authorities, the woman left the store without paying for the set and tried to get away in a taxi.


Hey Taxi

With a TV set right there to grab
She decided to go take a stab.
So she scooped up the set,
And thought her best bet
Was to run out and flag down a cab.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Singapore Keeps Ban On Chewing Gum

Government leaders in Singapore say they'll retain their ban on chewing gum. Parliament's secretary of national development, Mohamad Maliki Bin Osman, says the ban has reduced incidents of vandalism and litter. He adds that, before the ban, commuter delays were caused
when vandals prevented subway doors from closing with what he described as gobs of gum.


A Sticking Point

Some citizens of Singapore
Are joining forces to implore
The government to think anew,
And start permitting folks to chew.
The years-long ban on chewing gum
Is making islanders quite glum.
But leaders there, all thinking green,
Who want to keep the island clean,
Say subway trains would run quite late
When gum and doors conglutinate.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Starbucks Won't Ban Weapons

Starbucks Corp. says it'll allow customers to carry guns where it's legal. The chain refuses to get into debate over gun-control. Gun control advocates plan to carry a petition, with thousands of signatures, to Starbucks headquarters, demanding that firearms be banned in its shops.


Shooting The Breeze

Service deluxe,
At your favorite Starbucks
Includes packing heat
When you go there to eat.
Some folks seem irate,
But where OK'd by the State,
The powers that be
Allow you and me
To carry our guns
With our coffee and buns.
But those for control
Have as their goal
That Starbucks decree
Their shops be gun-free.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Tiger Playing Golf

Tiger Woods is home from Arizona and is hitting golf balls again.
As he began working out at the Isleworth driving range, colleagues
voiced hope that he'll be back in action in time for the Masters.


Up To Par

Golfing fans from all around,
From Orlando to Nantucket,
All wait as Tiger gets in shape,
Hitting golf balls by the bucket.

His colleagues, too, all hope he's back
In time to join the Masters.
This depends, in part, of course,
On his avoiding more disasters.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

TLC Says It Won't Renew Miss America

Miss America will no longer take her walk for the cameras of TLC. Pageant chairman Sam Haskell says the cable channel had offered to renew the show for less money. Haskell adds that other broadcasters have indicated interest in airing the pageant.


Where'd She Go, Miss America

TLC has bid the show
A sad but firm goodbye.
Although the contest has its fans,
The price tag was too high.

The man who heads the pageant now
Plans to re-ignite the sparks;
And again delight all those who watch,
As in the days of host Bert Parks.

© 2010 Jim Gordon

Democrats Confident On Health Care Reform

House speaker Nancy Pelosi says Barack Obama has the
votes he needs to get his health care reform bill through
congress. Some Republicans, meantime, warn of voter
backlash if the president uses reconciliation to pass his
bill.


If Push Comes To Shove

The time is up, Pelosi says.
The votes have been compiled.
She says the Prez has what he needs
To see health care reconciled.

© 2010 Jim Gordon